Quick question. How many male friends do you have? Wait, before you answer, we mean platonic male friends. And by that we mean, neither of you have romantic or sexual history with each other. Neither of you are attracted to one another either (you can find someone attractive and not be attracted to them). You trust each other completely and you know that when you offer up relationship advice, there’s no ulterior motive or shadiness lurking around.
There’s a bit more to the list, but for the most part, this is how we qualify a platonic male relationship. If you have even one or two of these in your life, count your blessings! They can be real lifesavers especially when you’re wondering how to get into a man’s mind. Plus, they’re not like your girlfriends. Girls sometimes have the tendency to see things how they want them to be, not how they are.
That’s why we’re HUGE FANS of going to guy friends for relationship advice. If you’ve never really thought about doing that before, here are some solid reasons why you should consult them before your girls...next time.
They Know How Men Think
OK, so your ex calls you up. Mind you, you haven’t heard from dude in like a year. But now he’s slippin’ into your DMs. You really did love this guy, so you ask your girlfriends if this means what you think it means. 8 times outta 10 (because they are girls too) they are going to tell you just what you want to hear: “Girl, you know what means he’s in love with you, right?!” Meanwhile your guy friends are going to be somewhere in the lane of “In your DMs?! Sorry. That’s a booty call.” Based on the time of day and what he says, don’t ignore their insight. They’re probably right. And how do they know? Because 8 times out of 10, they were slippin’ into someone’s DMs when you texted them about it.
They Have NO FILTER
Guy friends love us in a different way. It’s not about telling us what we want to hear. It’s more about telling us what we need to know. Straight, no chaser. And absolutely no filter. “Do you think I have sex too soon?” Ask a guy friend this and he might say “I’ll say this. I wouldn’t date a girl who does it as fast as you do.” It might hurt to hear, but sometimes the reality check can be a lifesaver and a game changer.
They Don’t Romanticize It
You’re with a guy who doesn’t treat you right. Every time you call a guy friend to cry about it, all he says is “Drop him.” When you go into all of the reasons why you don’t want to, after MAYBE a brief pause, your guy friend may say something like “If he’s so great, why are you calling me twice a week with this crap?” Here’s another example. Your birthday came…and went. And by “went”, we mean that your man didn’t do anything special for it. He barely grunted out a “Happy Birthday”. When you express how disappointed you feel, he goes into some long speech about being stressed out and that he’ll make it up to you. Your girlfriends are like “You know he’ll do something big for Christmas.” Meanwhile, when you tell your guy friend, he’s like “Girl, that guy doesn’t care about you. We know not to mess up our girl’s birthday.” Guy friends aren’t much for sugarcoating or over-romanticizing. But at least they help you to look at facts more than fantasy.
They’re Protective Of Your Heart
A true guy friend sees you like a little sister, even if you’re older than him. And because they know that some guys can really be VIP members of the creep squad, they tend to be overprotective. They know you’re a good girl, so they don’t want anyone to hurt you. This is reason enough to at least consider their advice. They’ve probably done a girl dirty before. They know it can affect how she treats the next guy. If they’re telling you something, it’s usually to spare you. Listen up.
There’s No Hidden Agenda
The best thing about guy friends is there’s no hidden agenda. If they’re sizing some dude up, giving you advice about ending a relationship or telling you that you deserve more or better (and you probably do!), it’s not to get in your pants. On top of that, they don’t have what some of your girlfriends might---slick jealousy issues. Yeah, you can’t always trust a girl’s advice because sometimes it’s about wanting what you have, not helping you to protect what you’ve got. If you don’t have at least one male friend, who is
just a friend, get one. It will make the dating game so much easier to play. No ifs, ands or buts about it.